It’s going to be hard. I don’t know when he’s leaving, but it must be sometime soon. It breaks my heart just a little bit more every day. There’s just… something about it that I can’t pin down. That I can’t… let go.

I gave Erika one of Eithne’s bracelets last night. Silver Celtic design. We had an issue over tutoring and I felt like she just couldn’t understand that we cared. That we were just another cog in the system fucking with her life; so I gave her the bracelet and told her to look at it whenever she felt we were getting on her about crap. Because if I gave her something so important to me, it’s obvious that we care about her a lot. I think she understood.

I have strep throat. Or so it feels like. I think I’m going to have to go to the Dr today (again). I just can’t get better. I’ve been awake since 5.30am. Not helpful. I see Barbara today–that at least should be helpful.

Sometimes I just feel so out_of_control of my life and my body. Especially when it comes to getting sick and getting well like this…

Advertisements